


Will You Take This Man Please

by anarchycox



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Domestic, Crack, M/M, eggsy works for harry hart, happy feels, kingsman are tailors, marriage proposals, silly conversations, silly thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-27
Updated: 2020-02-27
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:41:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22918636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anarchycox/pseuds/anarchycox
Summary: Eggsy and Jamal are quite respectable these days. Eggsy is a tailor's apprentice, and Jamal a police officer (which that took Eggsy a while to get over but that is so a story for another day). And Jamal wants to propose to Eggsy. Only he hears Harry say that a true gentleman asks for permission to propose.Now Jamal just has to figure out who he is supposed to ask that of.Inspired by and in the same universe as thenerdyindividual's Might Need Glasses.
Relationships: Jamal/Gary "Eggsy" Unwin
Comments: 24
Kudos: 157





	Will You Take This Man Please

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Might Need Glasses](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22236280) by [thenerdyindividual](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thenerdyindividual/pseuds/thenerdyindividual). 



“Eggsy, this place is…” Jamal was looking around. “Bruv, we’re at a gallery exhibition opening. Why?”

“Because Harry has family on the board and scored free tickets,” Eggsy explained. He was wearing one of his work suits and looking perfect, the arsehole. “And he wants me to get a bit of polish for working the front of the store.”

“People been complaining about you?” Jamal started to tense. “I’ll run them in.”

“Jamal, you give out parking tickets, who are you running in?”

“Oi, apparently I give them out well enough, I’m getting noticed. Something about keen eyes for crime.” Jamal had been an officer for six months now, and Eggsy was mostly over him joining the filth, because the pay and benefits meant they had gone to the dentist for the first time in three years, and their kitchen table was a real table now.

Also Jamal’s arse looked fucking amazing in the uniform, if he did say so himself.

They did learn though, that Eggsy had been arrested just enough back in the day that cops and robbers role play was out the window. 

“You have a keen eye for crime, because you used to be a criminal,” Eggsy whispered as the crowd grew around them.

“Yeah but you are such a softy, never run in was I?” Jamal kissed Eggsy’s cheek, thinking of all the times Eggsy had taken the heat. Of all the times they had together, and how he wanted a few more decades of them being them. He had joked about his plans for their future, but they had become more certain in his mind. They were all respectable now, finished paying off Michelle’s lawyer, even had a bloody savings account. 

He just had to figure out how to actually ask Eggsy to marry him, and have Eggsy believe it weren’t a prank. Jamal had thought of a few ways, but they all felt too bullshitty. He’d figure it out. They walked around the exhibit and okay it didn’t actually suck. “Wicked,” he said pointing at a painting of a woman having cut of a man’s head. “Dig it.”

“It is a decent example of -”

“Oh shut up, you just want to sound impressive so you can tell people later how you educated someone on the true meaning of the painting, which is clearly of the Rococo period, with the use of fading background there clearly influenced by Francois Boucher, but you would have focused on the meaning of her carrying the sword in her left hand and the symbolism of that since left is sinestra and evil and all that, when it is clearly in the left because that side is in shadow to emphasize the head she is holding.” Jamal smiled at the guy who sort of faded away.

“How the fuck did you do that?” Eggsy asked. “Also, were you right?”

“Course I’m right,” Jamal said. “Can’t sleep, some nights, so I watch art history shit on youtube, figuring it will put me to sleep. Only information stuck.”

“Right, we are finding a coat closet,” Eggsy nodded. “I need to suck your dick.” 

Jamal thought about the five laws he would have to arrest them for breaking and thought about Eggsy’s mouth. Guess six months on the force, and he was already corrupted. They started to walk through the crowd, but it was difficult and then they were stopped by Harry and his scary as fuck husband.

Like sure, Eggsy said that Merlin was a ‘dear’ and ‘bark worse than bite’ and ‘softy around Harry’ but the bloke had resting serial killer face. He looked like a man who knew hide a body that was never found. And in ‘government work?’ bull fucking shit with those arms.

“Hey, great art, we have to go,” Eggsy said to his boss.

“Nonsense, we just found you. Are you enjoying the exhibit? Please say you are enjoying it more than Merlin.” Harry gave that super posh polite smile he had. Always unnerved Jamal. How Harry smiled in public and how he smiled when Jamal picked up Eggsy in the backroom of the shop. The difference between public and private Harry was so palpable he wondered why none of these people ever caught onto it.

“Yeah, Jamal is digging it,” Eggsy said.

“Are you?” Merlin looked surprised.

“Bloke from the block can’t like art?”

“No, more the Rococo is bullshit, everything between medieval tapestries and Van Gogh is,” Merlin shrugged. 

“You like Van Gogh?” That surprised Jamal. “Why?”

“Because his paintings remind me of Harry.”

“What?” Both Eggsy and Harry said.

Jamal looked between them. “Turner for me and Eggsy.”

“Who?” Eggsy asked. “Is it like naked blokes or something?”

“Now that is interesting,” Merlin smiled, and Jamal thought it was supposed to be a friendly smile, but it just made him look even more murdery. “You and I are going to talk art one day.”

“Yay?” Jamal replied.

Harry seemed to be giving a smile and nod to a man across the room. “Lord Barnett is here. All chuffed. Jonathon finally asked permission to marry Miranda. We’re be the ones doing the wedding suits, I wager. That will be an interesting challenge for you Eggsy.”

“I love challenges,” Eggsy said, and Jamal didn’t comment on how Eggsy’s grip on his hand was cutting his blood off.

He got stuck on something else. “Asked permission, who does that anymore?”

Oh there was Harry’s posh snob face directed at him now. “Anyone who greatly respects their love,” he replied. “It shows a fundamental respect for the familial ties of a person, and that you know that while some things are perhaps old fashioned, they are never truly out of style.”

“Right, okay, bye!” Eggsy said and Jamal found himself dragged away. They didn’t find a coat closet, just headed back to their flat. Jamal was pretty sure the sex was good, but he was too distracted by the thought of how Eggsy patterned his manner off of Harry, how they were trying to be more respectable.

Guess he didn’t have to worry about proposing to Eggsy.

He had to propose to propose to somebody. He just had to figure out who.

Whom.

Who.

Bugger, if they were respectable they’d know the difference on that one. He’d google it in the morning.

*

“Ryan, think I am going to ask Eggsy to marry me.”

“Go on.”

“Really.”

“Cool.”

“You mind?”

“Why the fuck would I mind, unless it’s picking who I’ll stand beside. And well, we’ll decide that with a playstation marathon.”

Yeah, Ryan was not the right person to ask permission from.

*

“Uhhh, Mrs. B…bugger ummm Ms U?” Jamal flinched. Fuck what was he supposed to call Michelle these days. She had said to call her mum, but like fuck he would. He had a mum she was great. “Michelle?” That should work.

“Hiya, Jamal, this about the babysitting on Saturday?” She smiled at him from the doorway. “Sorry, sorry, come on in.” He went and sat at the kitchen table and she put the kettle on. “I can see about -”

“Nah, Eggsy is dead happy that Daisy is gonna sleep over. And I borrowed a bunch of stuff from cousins. We are well set for the princess pajama party.”

“OH?”

“Got me Tiana pjs,” Jamal joked. “So umm, fuck this hard.”

“What is it, hun? Is it Eggsy?”

“No, he’s at work, doing great. We’re great. I just,” Jamal took a breath. “I’ve loved that fucking idiot since we were 10. I mean then it was because he had the best football on the row, but you know, we met and just bam. He were it always. Now, bit of a different sort of love, but that that was there before is still there too, even when he comes home all poshed up, or tired, and says that sort of jackass mouthy thing that only he can say.”

“That’s nice?” Michelle was clearly lost, and frankly Jamal was too.

“I want your blessing to ask Eggsy to marry me.” Jamal nodded, there he said it.

And then he had to wait because Michelle were laughing so hard that she ran to the bog. Great him wanting to marry her son, made her take the piss. Literally.

Awesome.

He got himself a cuppa and went to the nursery where Daisy was sleeping in her crib. “Hey, Daisy?” Jamal whispered, “Can I have your permission to marry your brother?”

She twitched in her sleep, stretching, and he decided to take the raised arm as a yes.

Jamal went back to the kitchen and Michelle was there. “I’m sorry,” she said.

“No you aren’t,” he laughed a bit at himself. “I guess it is stupid.”

“It is very sweet,” she said and was mostly not lying. “And I give you permission, because you two belong together if anyone ever did. But aren’t you supposed to ask the father this sort of question. I am a mere woman and certainly never the head of the household to make decisions such as the goods and money that must be exchanged for betrothal.”

“Fuck off,” he said to his future mother in law.

She laughed and they had a beer, and talked potential wedding plans.

Eggsy didn’t have a father though. Well he did, but he were dead before Jamal knew Eggsy. And there was no grave to ask metaphorically.

There was just Harry, who Eggsy had once jokingly called the Daddy sort if one were into that sort of thing.

Boss, bit of a Daddy looking bloke. Had to count.

*  
“Jamal, a pleasure. Eggsy stepped out to get us lunch. He should be back soon. And don’t you look handsome in your full officer’s uniform.”

“Thanks,” Jamal felt hot and itchy in the crappy fabric. “Sir, I actually need a moment of your time.”

“What for?” 

Harry looked intrigued, and a touch concerned. “Is there a problem with Eggsy’s hours?”

“Why does everyone think this is about Eggsy?” Jamal asked. “I mean okay, yeah, it is about Eggsy, but he don’t know yet.” Lord why did the man look so happy.

“A surprise party, oh I love surprise parties. What sort of venue do we need? Merlin knows caterers.”

“How?”

“Government is always hiring caterers and he is the one who makes sure they don’t kill anyone.”

“Ha! Knew he were an agent or something.”

“Or something,” Harry replied. “Technically, the job is called liaison. But balloons. We must have balloons.”

“No, balloons scare Eggsy,” Jamal said automatically. “And this isn’t about balloons. I need to ask you a question. Well not you, needed to ask Lee, but he’d be dead like 18 or something years.”

“I am lost.”

“You said, right thing to do is to ask permission to marry someone. Been trying to find the right person. You are like my fourth now? But the closest he’s got to a da, so yeah. Here we go. Mr. Hart, may I please have permission to ask for Eggsy’s hand in marriage?” 

And Harry dropped the pattern weight he was holding in shock and screamed as it landed on his foot.

“Bugger,” Jamal said as Harry kept screaming. Turned out it was an antique iron thing, and he drove Harry to the nearest A&E and his uniform got them seen right quick, and Harry go the two broken toes wrapped up. “So, can I marry Eggsy?”

Jamal smiled an awkward smile at Harry, who glared at him. “I’ll ask you again in a few weeks.”

Merlin came storming in, furious that Harry was in the hospital and Jamal bolted like he were 17 and had allegedly stolen Poodle’s wallet.

*

“Hey, bruv?” Eggsy came in and Jamal was busy distracting himself with a video game. “Harry had a bit of an interesting afternoon.”

“Did he?”

“Yeah,” Eggsy sat on the couch and picked up a controller and dropped into the game. “Seems he dropped a weight on his foot. Broke a couple toes. Was blaming you and ‘the stupidest question that he has ever heard in his life?’ Want to share?”

“Asking to marry you is going to be the smartest thing I ever do, what the fuck is he doing calling it stupid?” Jamal glowered at the telly. “Fucking annoying git.”

“Huh?”

“You heard me,” Jamal said.

“Did you just fucking ask to marry me?”

“No,” Jamal snapped. “I asked Harry permission to ask you to marry me. Like he said a good bloke would do, if he respected his partner.”

“You’ve never respected me a goddamn day in our lives,” Eggsy said. “What the fuck is that about?”

“Don’t mean I don’t love your stupid perfect arse,” Jamal said. He tossed the controller down. “Don’t suppose he said yes?”

“I THINK IT MATTERS MORE THAT I SAY YES, YEAH?”

“Oh, come on, we both know you would say yes, but the key is did Harry say yes?”

“Yeah, he did,” Eggsy was smiling and fuck if it was the smile that made Jamal realize he liked boys as well as girls when they were 16. “He said, of course you can. So long as Harry gets to make the suits.”

“Good,” Jamal nodded. “Good then.”

“So, you have something to ask me, Jamal?”

“Yeah, you got paid right, we can go grab some Tikka from around the corner?”

“You fucking -” Eggsy started to pummel him with a pillow. Which honestly hurt, he wondered what the damn thing was filled with. “Ask me the right question!”

“What’s the best flavour of ice cream?” 

Another hit.

“Who is the best Monty Python?”

Another hit.

“Will you love me forever?”

“Aside from the whole I sure as fuck don’t love you right now, yeah of course I will.” The pillow was dropped. “Ask me.”

“Will you marry me, Eggsy?”

“Yeah,” Eggsy leaned down and kissed him. “Course I will.”

“See, knew you’d say yes. Always were a sure thing.”

“Shut it.”

They sat up and played more video games, and neither of them could quite stop smiling stupidly at each other.


End file.
